Why am i married?

So i wonder why people get marry? maybe there are couples who really do love each other and live the rest of their lives happily ever after, but for the misfortune who got married and later on woke up and said what the hell did i do? ( which is common these days) should read this blog and have a good laugh.

WHY AM I MARRIED?

You have two choices in life:

You can stay single and be miserable,

or get married and wish you were dead.
__________

At a cocktail party, one woman said to
another,

'Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong
finger?'

'Yes, I am. I married the wrong
man.'
__________

A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds:

'Husband Wanted'.

Next day she received a hundred letters.

They all said the same thing:

'You can have mine.'
__________

When a woman
steals your husband,

there is no better revenge than to let her keep
him.
__________

A woman is incomplete until she is married.
Then she is finished .
__________

A little boy
asked his father,

'Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?'

Father replied, 'I don't know son, I'm still
paying.'
__________

A young son
asked,

'Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa

a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?'

Dad replied, 'That happens in every country, son.'
__________

Then there was a woman who said,

'I never knew what real happiness was until I got
married,

and by then, it was too late.'
__________

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over
intelligence.
__________

If you want
your spouse to listen and

pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your
sleep.
__________

Just think, if
it weren't for marriage, men would go through life
thinking they had no faults at all.
__________

First guy says,
'My wife's an angel!'

Second guy remarks, 'You're lucky, mine's still
alive.'
__________

'A Woman's Prayer:

Dear Lord, I pray for: Wisdom, To understand a man , to
Love and to forgive him , and for patience, For his moods.
Because Lord, if I pray for Strength I'll just beat him
to death'
__________

AND NOW FOR THE FAVORITE!!!

Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop
with their nine children. A blind man joins them after a few
minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded
and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the
bus.



So the husband and the blind man decide to
walk. After a while, the husband gets irritated by
the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it on
the sidewalk, and says to him, 'Why don't you put a
piece of rubber at the end of your stick? That ticking sound is
driving me crazy.'

The blind man replies, 'If you had put a rubber at the
end of YOUR stick we'd be riding the bus, so shut
the hell up.'

P.s I will try to post up more rants now that i have more free time thanx for stopping by

xoxo- Di